A show... and dinner!!!

Heading over to the Continental Club this evening to take in the Southern Culture on the Skids show... for those of you not familiar with the band, they do a song called "8 Piece Box"... during live performances of this song, pieces of fried chicken are gently (or not so gently) tossed into the crowd, as seen here...



Fun! That being said, I don't think this concept would work nearly as well if Robert Earl Keen chose to do the same during a performance of "Five Pound Bass".

Just sayin'...

Fun Show!

Had a blast seeing Mates of State at Warehouse Live last Thursday... here's a vid someone shot of "For the Actor"

Celebrity Sort-of Look-Alike: Hall & Oates / Cartoon Edition

Keenly-coiffured Daryl Hall...

...and the character I've more or less emulated in every way (especially the not scoring aspect) since 1993, Beavis.

The man who took the baton from Art Garfunkel... and then passed it to Andrew Ridgeley, the magnificently-mustachioed John Oates...

...and long, lost "Garfield" character, Lyman.

You know what would be fun? SOME MUSIC!

Low's "Silver Rider"... suits the kind of mood I'm in today.

I swear to you all...

I lose another 100 pounds and I'm gettin' myself an ensemble not wholly unlike the one worn by Simon LeBon in the video for "Rio"!

DEAR GOD... I CAN STILL SEE IT WHEN I CLOSE MY EYES!!!

Don't ask how this got started... we were having a bit of a debate at the office yesterday as to which of these "music videos" is the most horrendous...

In what must be nothing short of sensory overload of joy of near orgasmic proportion for the discriminating nerd, Spock singing a song about hobbits and elves and gnomes... I think there's a line or two about The Hamburglar in there as well


And an attempt at a pop song by nine-time Olympic gold medalist Carl Lewis... a performance that makes his rendition of the national anthem at Madison Square Garden look like Placido Domingo performing the aria "Nessun Dorma"


THE HORROR! THE HORROR! So, which of these ballads is the greater sucker of ass? Well, from my particular perspective, as a fellow University of Houston alumnus, I find that Carl Lewis' effort transcends mere stupefying dreadfulness and actually fills me with a feeling of personal embarrassment at having that small measure of association with him.

I gotta break 'cause my mother said be home by dizzark

As the witches said, "Fair is foul and foul is fair." Well, some four hundred years after Shakespeare penned Macbeth, bad is now good and good... well, I guess good is still pretty much good. Anyway...

If one is to take the word in its literal sense, grant the term its intended import, I submit to you that there has never been a more aptly-named contrived musical act than the 1990's pre-pubescent R&B sextet Another Bad Creation.

We'll see ya at the playground kids, which, ironically enough, is where Michael Bivins is living these days, I believe.

Ted's top five PE tracks featuring Flavor Flav on lead vocals

1. Can't Do Nuttin' for Ya Man
2. Cold Lampin' With Flavor
3. Too Much Posse
4. Megablast
5. 911 Is a Joke

I wonder...

Now that Houston has become the largest U. S. city to elect an openly gay mayor, will all those big concert tours that always book Austin and Dallas, but routinely bypass our fair city, now start scheduling dates here?

I wonder...

In these oh so trying times...

I think it would behoove us to look to the wisdom found in these words of Reverend Run: "'cause Calvin Klein is no friend of mine... Don't want nobody's name on my behind."

Just think about that for a moment... think about it.

It just doesn't even begin to work...

I'm a big Lou Reed fan, and I love this song, but I have to say... as far as "unique" duets go, this is one of the very worst I can recall...

For no reason in particular...

BEZ DANCE!!!

I like Mates of State

ENOUGH, DAMN IT!!!

For the last time, MTV (and VH1... and any other crappy media outlet that insists on compiling such lists)... Sir Mix-A-Lot is NOT a so-called "One-Hit Wonder". In fact, I'm rather confident that amongst us, the fans, Baby Got Back isn't even close to the top of the list of what we consider to be Mix-A-Lot's best. In support of this assertion, I submit two videos... My Hooptie (no less than an anthem for those of us that drove beat up whips back in the day) and the seminal Posse on Broadway...





SWASS!!!

That Old Black Magic (has me in its spell)

It may sound like a strange combination, maybe it is, but I've grown very fond of this assembly when looking for a nosh... toasted bagel halves with a light spread of cream cheese and dill pickle planks. Perhaps it is odd, but I find it to be the nicest marriage of tangy and creamy since Louis Prima and Keely Smith.

ENOUGH ALREADY WITH THE CELEBRITY SORT-OF LOOK-ALIKES!!!

Sorry... can't help myself! :-)

The late, great rocker, Freddie Mercury...



...and the "Bennett" character from the Schwartzenegger classic Commando.



"C'mon, Bennett... let's party."

Yet Another Celebrity Sort-Of Look-Alike!!!

New Houston Rockets point guard Kyle Lowry...



...and former rapper / current man of God, Ma$e

Obnoxious or Infectious???

The 1979 OMD classic, "Electricity"...



I'm sayin' infectious... I freaking love that song!

A Ted Top Ten List

I've written on the matter of rap music a number of times recently... with this in mind, and after having suffered through the horror of the numerous performances from last Sunday evening's Grammy Awards broadcast, I though that I, one-time hip hop fan, would take the time to make a list of what I consider to be the ten most significant rap albums from the genre's three decades...

• 10) De La Soul: 3 Feet High and Rising (1989)
• 9) Wu-Tang Clan: Enter the Wu-Tang 36 Chambers (1993)
• 8) LL Cool J: Bigger and Deffer (1987)
• 7) Public Enemy: It Takes a Nation of Millions to Hold Us Back (1988)
• 6) EPMD: Strictly Business (1988)
• 5) Dr. Dre: The Chronic (1992)
• 4) Eric B. and Rakim: Paid in Full (1987)
• 3) N.W.A.: Straight Outta Compton (1989)
• 2) Beastie Boys: License to Ill (1986)
• 1) Run-DMC: Raising Hell (1986)

You'll notice that all these records were released between 1986 and 1993. As I've stated before, it's not, in my humble opinion, a matter of my tastes changing... I still love these albums and listen to them frequently to this day. I just think the genre, for the most part, has gone down the toilet... most of it is simply bad, bad music.

Pumping up my profile

With "urban" music having come to a degree of prominence such that it dominates the "mainstream" pop charts, music-makers such as Sean Combs and Jermaine Dupri have achieved heights of success that have seen them transcend the role of mere producer... these gentleman could best be described as superstar moguls. An enormous part of the high profiles they've crafted is their self-inclusion into the works of the acts they produce... frequently providing "backing vocals" of such utterances as yeah, uh huh, that's right and come on for their artists' tracks. And, of course, the natural progression of this has these producers also appearing in all the corresponding music videos. Not exactly the way Quincy or Clive did it, but hey...

Anyway, being a producer myself, albeit a local TV sports producer, I think it's about time I take steps to heighten my profile and reap some of the recognition I so richly deserve. I think it would be more than desirable to have me out on the desk (with the requisite bottle of Cristal in hand and chick in a bikini in my lap), aside my sports anchor as they do the nightly highlights, with me providing "backing voice over"...
"The Rockets at home tonight (that's right) looking to run their win streak to six as they take on the Spurs (uh huh)... second quarter, Rockets up four (what), Tracy McGrady with back-to-back threes to run the lead out to ten (yeah yeah), 49-39 (uh)... Rockets with the transition game going (come on), Carl Landry pulls down the board and gets it to Aaron Brooks streaking down the floor (uh uh uh), Brooks with the great ballfake to freeze the D (alright), he leaves it for Von Wafer, who finishes with the big slam (come on now)."

Dope... dope, I say.