So, the NBA playoffs are here...

YAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAWWWWWWWWWWWWNNNN!

Time to pass the torch

Now that John Madden has decided to hang it up as an NFL analyst, I think it's also time for him to consider passing the billion-dollar EA Sports video game franchise, Madden NFL, into a current analyst's capable hands. I'd love to see Solomon Wilcots NFL 2010!

From "Beach Party Vietnam"

It's a beach party Vietnam
Surfin' with the Viet Cong
Cookin' hot dogs with napalm
A beach party Vietnam

Frankie and Annette were
Layin' on the sand
When Frank got a letter
From his Uncle Sam
It said: Get Moon Dog and
All your friends
You're all invited to a...

Beach party Vietnam
Surfin' with the Viet Cong
Cookin' hot dogs with napalm
A beach party Vietnam

- Hey Frankie, aren't you gonna give me youur class ring?
- Oh I'm afraid I can't do that, Annette
- Why not?
- 'Cause I don't have any arms! (AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH!)

Ummmmmmmmm...

From your friends at Eternal Image (a division of Wham-O, if I'm not mistaken), "Precious Moments" urns and caskets.

Death (hey, do moments get any more precious than death?) has never been soooooooooo cute!!!

I'm sorry, but...

I don't think Jackie Robinson would be particularly fond of every single player in uniform in every game played today (the 62nd anniversary of his breaking Major league Baseball's "color barrier") wearing number 42... in his honor. I've read quite a bit about the man... I just feel he might find such a gesture way over the top.

Now, a mock court martial in his memory...

Golden MySpace Classics... Texas' Citadel of Stupidity's Greatest Hits, Vol. 9

Original post date: June 26, 2007 - Tuesday

Some of Ted's Favorite Quotes... ENJOY!

"It is better to be feared than loved, if one cannot be both." --Niccolo Machiavelli

"The better I get to know men, the more I find myself loving dogs." --Charles de Gaulle

"Work is the curse of the drinking class." --Oscar Wilde

"The mind is not a vessel to be filled but a fire to be kindled." --Plutarch

"Those who hate you don't win unless you hate them, and then you destroy yourself." --Richard M. Nixon

"What you leave behind is not what is engraved in stone monuments, but what is woven into the lives of others." --Pericles

"Some people are dumb." --Butt-head

"All of us might wish at times that we lived in a more tranquil world, but we don't. And if our times are difficult and perplexing, so are they challenging and filled with opportunity." --Robert F. Kennedy

"Mmmmmmmm... beeeeer." --Homer Simpson

"Everything that irritates us about others can lead us to an understanding of ourselves." --Carl Jung

"When we went back to the dressing room after the game, that parrot was dead." --Archie Manning

"I have come here to chew bubblegum and kick ass. And I'm all out of bubblegum." --Nada (played by Roddy Piper) in They Live


PROFOUND!!!

Veggie Sliders!

Portobello mushrooms, sweet yellow onion, red, green and yellow bell peppers and poblano peppers hickory grilled and served on grill-toasted rolls with provolone and spicy mayo...

Turned out pretty well... nice smoky / sweet combo!

They say,

"You can't have your cake and eat it too." If "have your cake" implies that one would make love to their cake before eating it, this is probably a good thing.

I wonder...

How many people under the age of 30 are aware that searchlights were, over the last century-plus, vital instruments in times of war, used to spot enemy vessels and aircraft... and not, in fact, merely developed as tools to promote the opening of a nightclub or the new Hannah Montana film?

I wonder.

I don't know that my faith in mankind can continue to survive such blows...

This Tyler Perry person, of whom I had never heard until last year when, out of nowhere, his name was suddenly affixed to every television or film production involving black folks in fat suits or badly made up to look old (hasn't Eddie Murphy already about worn out this "comedic" device???), apparently made $125 M last year... ONE HUNDRED TWENTY FUCKING FIVE MILLION DOLLARS!!! A cable tv comedy (ahem) series, a couple of films (rated 3.2 and 2.9 out of 10 stars by the film fans of IMDB.com) and what else I cannot tell you... and here's 125 mil for your troubles. For God's sake, Will Ferrell (who I would not so much as piss on were he set aflame) only made $31 M.

America... you continue to disappoint me with increasing, and alarming, frequency.

I've also learned...

that working consecutive 60 hour weeks is not conducive to being a productive blogger.

WOO HOO!!!

HAPPY OPENING DAY, EVERYONE!!! :-)